Man

As the wind picks up and the rain comes down, we can feel in the air that winter is just around the corner, and there are a few accessories you’ll need to keep warm while still looking like a smooth operator.

Winter affords men the best opportunity to be both functional and fashionable. Every man should rely on a few key pieces to build an outfit upon. These staples are a must this winter if you want to look as lethal as James Bond, and as toasty as a polar bear.

First of all, no respectable gentleman would leave his two-story town house in Vaucluse without the classic black scarf. The neck is the only thing that keeps your well-manicured head standing straight, so you better keep it warm. A proper length scarf should be no longer than your height, plus thirty centimetres. This allows it to wrap neatly once around your neck, with the excess hanging stylishly in front. Don’t wrap it around more than once; having the thickest looking neck at the train station does nothing for your appearance, let alone your chances with women. Be it wool, cotton, hand made, or tartan print, anything will do, but black is non-negotiable. If it’s black it can go with anything.

Second, as a multipurpose and prepared, man for all seasons, an umbrella is a sidekick you should consider investing a pretty penny in. An initial outlay means you can afford to buy quality. A general rule of thumb in life is “You get what you pay for”; so if you grab that two dollar fold up from the Chinese stand in desperation, then expect to put it in the bin within a week. A strong gale comes along and it flips inside out, then it’s never like it was. Ensure that it’s large enough to comfortably protect two people;

  1. You want to keep all your parts dry enough for your next business meeting across town.
  2. Remember that girl last week that struggled to stay dry with a newspaper over her head while waiting for the bus? Well now picture yourself standing next to her making all the proper introductions.

Splash your hard-earned cash and get something that will last you a few years. And again, black. Have you ever seen those people twirling their plastic vinyl rainbow umbrellas on the street? Well that’s not you. You’re a man of means, a gentleman with class. Kindergarten was the last class those rainbow people came from.

And last, the harsh winter winds will have a hard time penetrating the thick luxurious linings of a knee length woollen trench coat with double-breasted buttons or a sash belt tie. A worthwhile coat is the frame in which you present yourself to the judgemental world. A high-neck collar with deep collar points will accentuate your scarf and keep rain off the nape of your neck. Now your face is the masterpiece of your outfit. Any longer than knee length and you’ll risk getting it dirty from the sidewalk. Now, unlike before, black is not essential, but you still want something neutral. When was the last time you saw James Bond wearing a bright green coat made by The London Fog? A nice beige, or dark grey, will be versatile enough to go with many different outfits.

When you’re out there looking lethal and protected from the elements, you’ll often catch people staring, groups of teenage girls will giggle as you float past, unfashionable men will be squinting with jealousy, and your fellow gentlemen will nod with respect as you pass in the street. Remember one thing, with great fashion comes great responsibility, you are a gentleman and your powers must be used wisely.

Jake Cupitt